Posts
September 13, 2019
“I know you are incredibly busy, so I hesitated to even send this to you…” I read those words and lowered my eyes. Sad. My student who I have been working with for years now, concerned she would be cluttering my inbox. She simply wanted some feedback on a very short document. “I know you are super busy, so just call when you have a chance.” My own mother taking deference to my hectic schedule. “How’s your morning going? Let...
July 31, 2019
The other week, I found myself in a humid hotel café in Saba, Honduras, sipping blazing hot, very dark coffee. Too cheap to pay for the international plan for my cell phone, I was soaking up some WiFi before the work of the day with my mission partners from Children of Soledad. I mindlessly scrolled through the US news sites and read about current events back home. Suddenly, from my dusty Honduran vantage point, I was pierced by the words...
May 8, 2019
An email came to my inbox a few months ago advertising an internal position having nothing to do with surgery. I deleted it. Then through a meandering path of conversations, in person and on Twitter, with friends and colleagues both at home and away, I had a change of heart. Something compelled me to desperately dig through my deleted emails until I found this one. I felt a little nauseous dragging it back to my active inbox. I let it...
March 12, 2019
When my kids were little(r), I always insisted they say “thank you”. For everything. “Now, what do you say….?” C’mon parents…you know exactly what I am talking about, right? Every little piece of candy/sticker/trinket. Sheepish look and a whispered “thank you” will suffice. So…what about us now? Why don’t we say “thank you” like we should? Like we always used to? I guess no one is breathing down our necks like they did when we were kids. So we slide...
February 7, 2019
Fatigue, burnout, distress. Well-being, self-care, resilience. Tools. Prevention. Resources. Mindfulness. Yoga. Balance. This. Is. Exhausting. I’ve heard talk after talk at national meetings on burnout over the past few weeks. And months. And, well…years. And we are still talking about it. And we are still burned out. We are doing this wrong… I’m preparing my own talk on burn out. And I’m struggling to say anything new. But I promised myself I wouldn’t just say what’s been said before because...
December 30, 2018
Just a week ago, he was driving long distances to the grave of his long since deceased wife…to pay his respects, to tell her he loves her…again. Now, he is helpless and confused, clinging to life in the ICU after a terrible car accident. His family, exhausted by the days of worrying and rapid changes in his status, has gone home to rest. Suddenly, his heart is racing wildly, his blood pressure drops precipitously. “Can you meet me at the...
November 19, 2018
The clinking of the knives on the side of a water glass at the wedding reception, beckoning the new bride and groom to kiss…yet again. It’s the tradition I grew up with, but the shtick is stale now. We get it. They are married. They have probably kissed a million times at this point. Especially these friends…dedicated and in love with each other for more than a dozen years before the wedding. So the groom cut us off before we...
October 17, 2018
Delta and I have become good friends over the past year. Between a few special trips to celebrate weddings and anniversaries, and a few meetings for work, I have been in the air a lot this year. I know where the good restrooms are in ATL and DTW. I still loathe travel through SLC, but I found a new favorite in MSP. I have my routine down to a science. Always choose the aisle seat. Place the arm rest down,...
September 1, 2018
This post is about death. I am just warning you, in case you don’t want to read any more…if death bothers/scares you. I mean, the title is Death, but I am just saying it again…so you can bail if you want to. (Pause…) Ok, so you are still with me. We are gonna have to talk about this. Death. The finality of it. The horror, the fear, the sadness. And…the wisdom, hope and beauty of death. This week, we said...
August 7, 2018
We recently received a mass email from our Department Chairman that included some updates and general information. Towards the end of the message, he explained that we should expect a meeting invitation for our annual, individual one-on-one meeting with him. He stated the four questions that he will ask, offering them in advance to allow each of us time to contemplate an answer. The last question was, “What are you working on and how can I help you?” I am...