surgeon

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April 23, 2018

Perfect…

It’s college visit time. Shiny brochures, dozens of postcards, accolades in headlines…Best School, Best Value…Top 10…Number 1. One of these beautiful schools will be The Perfect One for Jack. The best education for the money in the best location. Surely it will become clear…although, after a few visits, we are more overwhelmed than we anticipated. The gorgeous campus has the highest price tag, but the highest ranked school is so big we are afraid he’d feel lost…finding the perfect one is going to...

April 2, 2018

The Bag

Let’s talk about The Bag. The hand/purse/satchel/work/weekender/lunch/tote/gym bag. The wristlet/cross-body/shoulder/back-pack bag. I have leather and canvas; nylon and vinyl. I have bags with pockets and those without; bags with zippers and open top buckets. I have brown and navy; black, taupe and tan; pink and red. I have a bag for everyday and one for vacations. I have a bag for the beach and one for the mountains. I have a bag that holds the bags. What. Is. The. Deal?...

March 15, 2018

Truth

Ben sat on the floor in his closet with tears in his eyes. He had been scolded and sent to his room after being caught playing on his computer after he was told to stay off of screens for a while. Then when confronted about said usage, I received a decisive, “No. I wasn’t on my computer.” Lie. Busted. To the bedroom. I let him wallow for a few minutes before I went upstairs to find him in a puddle...

February 20, 2018

I’ll Take Wisdom

In the wake of yet another school shooting, emotions are running high on social media. It’s politics as usual on Twitter and new issues and hashtags are cropping up faster than we have time to resolve them. I’ve been spinning around my cycle of email, Facebook, Twitter, news sites and Instagram. I have been tagged in several posts which leaves my phone dinging with notifications at all hours. And my mind racing trying to decide if and how to respond. And all...

December 29, 2017

The Space Between

It’s the awkward week between Christmas and New Year’s. The kids are home, my husband took the week off, family and friends have been in and out. Months ago, as my partner was making the call schedule, he asked each of us to list the days we wanted off. I put in my request to have this week free, knowing that several other partners would do the same, and that I probably would end up with at least one call....

December 1, 2017

Organized

I am so organized. You don’t even know…My shirts are arranged in my closet by color; each of my upcoming conferences/trips has its own manilla folder complete with checklists and a pocket for receipts; I keep duplicates of all my toiletries and make up at home and work so I am never at either place without something; I catalog my favorite recipes on Pinterest and spend sleepless nights on call choosing what to make for dinner the next night. I...

November 16, 2017

Joy

When the alarm went off this morning, I tapped the snooze button over and over for an hour. Finally, I made it downstairs for my morning ritual of coffee and devotions. By coincidence, or more likely God’s humor, my personal reading and the church’s automatic email, were both about joy. Soul soothing words, as recently, life has felt a little bitter, a little empty. Jarred by the sudden death of a dear friend’s husband and my welling anger of American...

October 9, 2017

So Tired

As it turns out…I’m tired. Just really, really tired. My partners and I are participating in a study to examine the physiologic toll that nights on call have on our bodies. We are all wearing these little wrist bands that track our heart rate and sleep. We check our apps every morning…the little wheels spin and spew forth numbers about our heart rate variability, our sleep quality, and our “recovery”. This data will be matched with our call schedules and...

August 5, 2017

The Margins

I was asked to arrange a meeting with a few consultant services who regularly participate in the care of our patients. I glanced through my calendar…between my call schedule, some upcoming travel and some events with the family, I found just three possible dates in August. It came as no surprise that the invited attendees weren’t available those dates, so back to the calendar…very few dates in September, even fewer in October. It could be Thanksgiving before we get together....

June 27, 2017

Failure

I’m not really one who appreciates failure very much. I’m pretty used to working very hard for the things that I want and generally reaching some degree of success. It may be luck, it may be hard work, but in the end, I usually feel like I am successful in the things I put my mind to. But this time…it was different. Failure smacked me in the face. I was angry and frustrated and disappointed and sad…and very, very thankful....